Falling in Love...Again Read online

  The moment I stepped into my apartment, the blinking light on the answering machine caught my attention. I was across the room in three strides, and jabbed the play button to retrieve the first of two messages.

  “Hi, Nicole. It’s Rafe. I was wondering if you’d like to have dinner with me tonight at Nacho Mama, and then I could hang around with you at the library while you study. Give me a call on my cell.”

  Decision time had arrived. But before I returned his call and gave him my answer, I let the machine play the second message.

  “It’s me again, Nicole. I’m really sorry but I just got called back to the home office and I’m taking the three forty-five flight to Dallas. I’ll call you when I get back home.”

  A quick glance at my watch showed me that I was thirty minutes too late. Thirty minutes: the amount of time I’d spent browsing the magazine section at the campus bookstore.

  Thirty minutes earlier I’d been filled with confusion and doubt, but now I realized that the best thing to ever happen to me had just flown away.

  Save the Planet was a rousing success—again—and I was enjoying every minute I’d spent working at the Feral Felines booth. The last year had brought a lot of changes to my life. I had made a decision to stop letting life pass me by and to start living for the moment. So what if I hadn’t had a decent date since my last evening with Rafe? My life was no longer defined by the men I dated.

  Graduation was two weeks away, and I was preparing to start my career and life on my own. I had accepted a job with a lucrative CPA firm, which had terrific potential for career growth.

  As four o’clock approached, I hurried to the concert area and spread my blanket under the same tall oak as last year. Reclining, I watched the clouds morph in and out of familiar shapes, and dreamed about unexpected places, and a certain man who’d blocked my view.

  We had shared very precious moments last year—even more precious now in retrospect. After reality set in and Rafe returned home, he called as promised and we kept in touch via phone and email for nine months. But a long-distance relationship is difficult to maintain, and when the calls and emails began to taper off, I began to suspect that anything he might have felt for me was over. I still had some feelings for him, but it was time to move on and look for another Mr. Right. I’d almost found love in an unexpected place once before—maybe I could do it again.

  A slight breeze ruffled the grass as the band began its warm-up. I pulled a sweater around my shoulders and listened as they segued into their first tune.

  “Is this spot taken?”

  Could it be? No, it was just a coincidence that a tall man was blocking my view and asking the same question from a year before. He was dressed in faded jeans and a leather jacket, which hugged his body and showed off his physique to perfection.

  “Mimi told me I’d find you here,” he said, confirming my suspicion. “May I?” He pointed to the empty spot beside me on the blanket, a beseeching look filling his dark eyes.

  “Help yourself.” I shrugged my shoulders, unsure if I should assert myself and tell him to take a hike, or risk letting all the emotions I’d buried bubble to the surface again.

  “How’ve you been?” he asked and lowered himself to the blanket. “Graduation is getting pretty close isn’t it?”

  The spicy scent of his aftershave teased my nose and heightened my awareness of him. I was dragged back to the weekend we’d spent together a year before, and I could feel tears pricking my eyes. I blinked rapidly to hold them back, unwilling to reveal to him how much he had affected me.

  “It’s in two weeks,” I managed to answer, but my voice threatened to betray my emotions.

  He nodded. “You must be excited,” he continued, apparently ill at ease. “I guess you must be wondering why I’m back in town.”

  I shouldn’t have cared, but despite everything, I still had feelings for him that surged to the forefront and rattled my senses. This time it was my turn to nod, fearful that if I spoke again those tears would begin to fall.

  “My company promoted me and I’ve been reassigned to the regional office here in Raleigh. I start work on Monday.”

  My heart sank and the tears slid down my cheeks. He reached out tentatively and brushed the tears away with the pad of his thumb.

  “What’s wrong, Nicole?”

  Where did I start? With the myriad of emotions running through me right now? The aching I’d suffered when he’d left a year ago? The miles that would separate us once again?

  I swallowed hard, trying to contain the tears. “I have a new job, too. A great CPA firm made me an offer I couldn’t resist,” I explained.

  “That’s really wonderful! Congratulations! Do you start work right after graduation?”

  I nodded again and then paused before I let the other shoe drop. “I’m taking a week to visit my family and get everything in order, and then I’m flying to Dallas—”

  “Dallas? Why are you going to Dallas?”

  I paused a beat and then delivered the news. “The CPA firm is in Dallas. That’s where I’ll be living now.” And you’ll be living here.

  Rationally, I knew that Dallas was a big metropolis and the odds of just running into Rafe on the street were astronomical, but I’d harbored a secret wish that we could get back together again. My head told me that he was most likely involved with another woman and that was the reason he’d stopped communicating. But my heart—

  Right now my heart was telling me that the best thing to ever happen to me had just slipped through my fingers again.

  Rafe exhaled a long sigh, and then he raked his fingers through his neatly trimmed hair. “Wow, Nicole. This changes everything.”

  I tilted my head to one side and stared at him quizzically.

  “Everything? What do you mean?”

  He scrubbed at the back of his neck. “I had no idea that you had a job offer in another town. So I suppose I’ll just have to make a counter offer.”

  “Counter offer?” I was puzzled by his comment, because I knew for certain that his company didn’t hire newly graduated accountants.

  “Yeah, a counter offer, but first I’ll need some pertinent information. What is your new job paying you?”

  I bristled immediately. “That’s really none of your business.”

  “It is if I’m going to make a competitive offer. Let me put it this way; what kind of salary would it take for you to turn down the job in Dallas?”

  I considered his question and stated an amount.

  “Hmmm. How about travel? Are you going to have to travel any with this company?”

  Part of my duties as a bottom-of-the-totem-pole employee would be to visit branch offices in other Texas cities and work with the various types of companies they served. Goldberg & St. Claire handled large cattle ranches, oil companies of all sizes, shipping concerns on the Texas gulf coast, aerospace and defense contractors in various parts of the state, and numerous computer technology firms that had sprung up in the wake of Internet growth.

  “Quite a bit at first,” I replied.

  He scratched his head, deep in thought. “Okay. That gives me what I need to know, so here’s my counter offer.”

  “Now? I mean, don’t you have to go back to your superiors and get authorization or something?” I might have been new to the corporate world, but I knew from my summer internships that there were procedures in any company.

  “I have full authority to do this.” One corner of his mouth pulled into a smile. “So here’s the deal: I can’t match the salary from the Dallas firm, but instead of dollars, how about dozens of hugs and kisses every day?”

  I gave him a puzzled look and started to interrupt, but he quieted me with a finger to my lips.

  “I can offer you travel, however. I’ll take you to the stars every night in my arms if you’ll give me the chance.”

  His words sent my pulse spinning. If I understood correctly, my dreams were about to come true.

  “What about insurance?” I ask
ed, my voice husky with emotion.

  “You can be assured that I will do everything in my power to make you the happiest woman on earth, Nicole,” he whispered. “I was a fool to let you slip away. I could have made things work, but I got scared that you didn’t love me as much as I loved you.”

  “We were both fools,” I said, wrapping a strand of hair around my index finger in a nervous gesture. “But can we start all over again and make it work?”

  He shook his head and I feared I had lost him again.

  “I don’t want to start over. I want to pick right up from where we left off.”

  It was more than I’d ever imagined, yet everything I’d ever desired. Rafe was the man of my dreams.

  “I never expected to find love like this,” he said, brushing his lips against mine. “But sometimes the best things come in the most unexpected packages.” THE END

  We Lust After the Couple Next Door!

  LOVE THY NEIGHBOR

  A Wife-Swapping Tale of Just Desserts

  Jerry wanted a divorce. He broke the news to me in his usual quiet way.

  “We don’t have anything in common,” he stated.

  My head was spinning with so many emotions: terror that I’d be out on the street or living in my car, hurt because I still loved him and I wanted our marriage to work, and wonder because I couldn’t understand why, after ten years of marriage, I’d had no idea this was coming. I began to cry.

  “Don’t do that,” he said. “It’s no one’s fault. We’ve drifted apart. It’s no big deal.”

  It might not have been a big deal to him, but it was a huge deal to me. Those few words would forever change our lives and that of our daughter, Heidi.

  I waited for Jerry to move out of our house, but he never mentioned moving, nor did he suggest that I leave. He had moved into the guestroom, but when I broached the subject of one of us leaving our home, he merely shrugged and said, “All in good time.”

  I wasn’t sure what to think, and as the months passed, we fell into an amicable friendship. Heidi was doing well in school, and I hoped that my husband was just going through a phase and that eventually he’d see that we were meant to be together.

  During the second month of our strange living arrangement, I embarked on an extensive self-improvement program. Each week, I went to the library and checked out a stack of self-help books. I read everything from why I loved Jerry too much to the book about which planet he came from and why women don’t understand men.

  I read diet books, exercise books, and cookbooks. I trimmed the fat from my diet and worked out regularly. I even began attending a group for women like me who were having marital problems.

  Jerry noticed. Oh, how he noticed. I was passing him in the hallway one evening, and all of a sudden, he grabbed me and pushed me up against the wall.

  “You’re lovely, Cora.” He kissed me slowly and deeply. “You’re more beautiful than the day we married.” He kissed me again.

  I could feel his warm fingers on my breasts. I thought perhaps he’d come to his senses and finally realized what a rash and ridiculous idea a divorce was.

  Just as suddenly as he’d reached for me, he pulled away and stammered, “I, uh, have to be somewhere.” He hurried out of the house so fast; I didn’t even have a chance to ask him where he was going.

  Jerry avoided me for the next few days. I watched him come and go, and I wondered why he was being so mysterious. He still didn’t move out of the house, so I continued to hope that we could possibly save our marriage.

  I was at the library, checking out another stack of self-help books, when someone tapped me on the shoulder.

  “I’m Drew Chandler,” my next-door neighbor said. “I was wondering if you had a little time to talk.”

  “Sure.” I shoved my books into my bag. “What’s on your mind?”

  “Let me buy you a cup of coffee.” He steered me toward the coffee bar across the street.

  Drew wasn’t the handsomest man I’d ever met, but I’d always liked him because he seemed very attentive the few times I’d spoken to him. I wondered if that was what his wife, Linda, found so appealing about him. With just his eyes, Drew could make a woman feel as if she was the only woman in the world.

  Once we were settled at one of the cute little bistro tables, Drew seemed more interested in stirring his coffee than talking. I finally broke the ice by commenting that he seemed depressed.

  “I was wondering what you planned to do about Linda and Jerry,” he finally blurted out.

  I felt as if someone had punched me right in the stomach. Linda, of all people!

  I caught my breath and asked slowly, “What do you think we should do?”

  “They want to get married,” he sighed. “At least that’s her plan.” He wiped at his eyes, and I wondered if he was crying.

  All the little shreds of information I’d collected for the past few months suddenly made sense. While I’d been thinking that Jerry was reluctant to leave the house because he didn’t really want a divorce, he was actually staying there because it provided easy access to Linda. He wasn’t just a lying cheat; he was cheap as well, not willing to spend the gas money to visit his girlfriend.

  “I don’t see how we can stop them,” I said with more confidence than I felt. “I’ve been reading a lot of books about this type of thing, and if they are determined, there’s nothing we can do to stop them.”

  Drew began to cry in earnest now, dabbing at his eyes and blowing his nose loudly in a napkin.

  “I don’t know how she can do this to me!” he cried. “I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, and I’m barely making it to work.”

  “I know how you feel,” I told him. “I’ve been a wreck myself.”

  “You seem pretty pulled together.” He sniffled.

  “Oh.” I blushed. “I decided that, rather than feel sorry for myself, I’d get myself into good shape, mentally and physically.”

  “You do look good, Cora. Jerry is a damn fool for letting you slip away.”

  I smiled. “He doesn’t see it that way.” I sounded stronger than I felt. “He doesn’t want to acknowledge that he ever loved me. He just wants to move on.”

  Drew reached across the table and patted my hand. He had nice hands, and his touch was warm and comforting.

  “Cora, you have so much more insight than I do. I guess I’ve just been so caught up in the pain of this whole thing.”

  “Me too,” I admitted. “I’m hurt and angry, but what can we do? These are two adults we’re talking about, and if we really love them, we have to allow them their freedom.”

  “I’m trying. I’m envious of your ability to see things so clearly.”

  I found myself recommending a whole list of books. Drew finally got up and said he was going back to the library.

  “I need to do something,” he declared. “Otherwise, I’ll be completely crazy and do something rash.”

  “No you won’t,” I assured him, giving him a quick hug. “You’re stronger than you think.”

  I went home and spent the rest of the afternoon crying. How could Jerry have been so deceitful? How could Linda, who claimed to be my friend, become involved with my husband? I wanted to kill them both.

  Then I’d think about Jerry lying in a coffin, and I’d begin to cry again. I didn’t want him dead, but I didn’t want him to be able to hurt me anymore, either. I was stuck in that awful place between love and hate, and I wasn’t sure which emotion would win.

  When Heidi came home from school, I managed to pull myself together. “How would you like to go out to dinner?” I asked her.

  “Sure! Are we going to get hamburgers?” she asked.

  “If you want.” I smiled. “Let’s go to a nice restaurant though, not a fast-food place.”

  I took her downtown to a modest family restaurant, and we lingered over dinner. Heidi’s cheerful chatter kept me from bursting into tears, and I found myself enjoying the evening. By the time we made our way to the car, I knew I didn’t
need a man in my life. I certainly didn’t need a man like Jerry.

  “Mommy, what’s wrong?” Heidi asked finally.

  “I’m just tired,” I told her. “I’ll be okay after a good sleep.”

  She yawned. “I guess I’m tired, too.”

  We drove home in silence while I thought about what I’d do when I finally saw Jerry. Heidi looked out the window, and I wondered what she was thinking about.

  “Where have you been?” Jerry came flying down the stairs toward the car. “I was ready to call the hospitals to see if something had happened to Heidi—”

  “Why?” I asked.

  “What do you mean why?” He hugged Heidi before she pulled away and headed into the house. “I didn’t know where you were.” He sounded like a five-year-old.

  “We went out to dinner.” I walked up the steps into the house.

  Jerry followed at my heels. “You went out to dinner without me?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why? I’m always home in time for dinner.”

  “So I’ve noticed.” I hung my coat in the closet, then kicked off my shoes.

  “I get it,” he said as if he’d just figured out next week’s winning lottery numbers. “You’re mad at me because I forgot something.” He scratched his head stupidly. “It’s not your birthday, and it’s not our anniversary.”

  “I believe you forgot you had a wife and a family.” I hurried down the hall to my bedroom. Once inside, I locked the door, making sure to do it loudly enough that he’d know he would never be welcome in my room again.

  Jerry was gone before I got up in the morning. I imagined him hurrying to Linda and hissing, “I think she knows about us.” Why would Linda care? Drew already knew all about the affair, so she’d have nothing to lose.

  I dropped Heidi off at school, and then I began searching the Yellow Pages for a good attorney. I was too embarrassed and ashamed to ask anyone I knew for a lawyer referral.

  I made six frustrating telephone calls before I found someone I felt I could talk to. Three of the first six made me feel as if I was a part of an assembly-line process, where they just shuffle standardized divorce papers across their desks.